my only real long term goal in life is to be a hot mom. my priorities are in order.
Do you ever sometimes think dirty thoughts when you’re in a public place and then start to think about if someone is telepathic so you start throwing around random things in your head like oooh cupcakes
(Source: pantere)
" I go through phases. Somedays I feel like the person I’m supposed to be, and then somedays, I turn into no one at all. There is both me and my silhouette. I hope that on the days you find me and all I am are darkened lines, you still are willing to be near me. "
(Source: wordsthat-speak)
the sexual tension when u and ur crush are online on fb at the same time and u just stare at their lil green dot
and suddenly you know what gatsby felt like
(Source: twoukofukawa)
i actually like asshole couples best like the couples that pick on each other so much and call each other names but it’s okay because you know they’re actually totally in love and none of it is meant in a mean way and every insult is punctuated by a sweet comment to remind the other how much they actually adore them and i’m sorry but there isn’t anything cuter ok
HOW COOL WOULD IT BE TO BE HOT AND PEOPLE LIKE DISCUSS HOW HOT U WERE EVEN WHEN U WEREN’T THERE THAT WOULD BE SO COOL
- Friend: go ask
- Me: no you go ask
- Friend: no you
- Me: fine can i have ketchup
things that should be allowed to be used in essays:
- i shit you not
- you feel me
- no but get this
- i’m just sayin
- let me explain you a thing
- and yeah
(Source: doctortveit)
my dad turned off the light while i was still in the room did you forget who decides to put you in the nursing home or not
